October 6, 2007
"All writers are vampires." -- James Gandolfini
Yes, it is true. We writers suck out every bit of life we come across. Everything is copy; everything is material for a story.
Neighbors, family, and friends are not immune to the curiosity of a writer. Make no mistake about it, writers do not just observe, they absorb every nuance, and they drink in every emotion they encounter.
As this is happening, the innocent bystander may not be aware of any of it. The blameless observer may not know that a writer, aka vampire, is watching and lurking nearby. Just ask my neighbors.
Vampires, the stuff of centuries of mythology and folklore, suck blood; writers suck ideas. Both are interested in your soul, albeit for different reasons.
I started thinking about this odd parallel between writers and vampires when I read a blockbuster bestseller series recently about a normal teenage girl, Bella Swan, who falls in love with a vampire. Sound silly? Maybe so, but this series has moved from teen genre to mainstream global Harry Potter-style popularity faster that the strongest vampire can run.
In other words, it is hot.
Like a number of others in my baby boomer age group, I wanted to read all three of Stephenie Meyer's books, "Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse" in order to keep up with the latest teen book craze.
We parents and grandparents have to stay on top of things do we not.
It did not take long into the story to notice that the vampires in Meyer's tale bear an uncanny similarity to writers. Both prey on humans. It is just that the vampires want... well you know what they want.
Makes the hair stand on one's arms.
This teen vampire story involves a family of benign vampires who have human-like feelings, do not prey on people, and use their supernatural powers for good. The only problem is that our heroine is in love with one of the good vampires, Edward, and Bella's best friend, Jacob, is in love with her. And on top of that, there are bad vampires out there who desire her blood.v
Unfortunately for Bella, Jacob turns into a werewolf when he gets mad. Since werewolves and vampires are natural enemies, our heroine has quite a problem--her best friend and her boyfriend want to kill each other and could accidentally kill her as well. During all the terror, Bella has to keep up on her calculus homework, work at an after-school job, apply to colleges, and hide the fact that she is hanging out with monsters.
All I can say is, "What a story idea! Wish I had thought of it."
A note of warning is in order here. Folklore says twilight is the safest time of the day to be around vampires. Around writers, there is no safe time, and all the garlic in the world will not help you.
